Recently, I got the chance to spend nearly a month of my summer in Nairobi, Kenya. Thinking back on the experience, I believe it is one of the most eye-opening and inspiring experiences I have ever had. I believe there is undeniable growth in placing yourself in an unfamiliar place and challenging yourself to "blend" and understand the new world in which you have entered. I told the students, who have often asked me how I felt about Kenya, that it is a constant adventure, with new discoveries around each and every corner. It was true. I came to see things that I previously had taken for granted, like something as simple as toilet paper being constantly available in public bathrooms, to stop lights on the street to help regulate traffic. I discovered the challenge of a language barrier, but more than that, an accent barrier. I found myself talking much quicker than some people could understand my speaking. I saw monkeys on random trees in places with tons of humans. I ate an enormous amount of new food and I introduced my host family to one of my favorite classics: pesto pasta. I taught high school girls the important of self-esteem and I strived to show as many girls as I could know they matter. It was a truly a constant adventure and one I will never forget.
Being in a new country can be a scary adventure, but I was lucky enough to have the kindest most loving host family by my side. Kenya is a very different place than the United States. For one thing, I thought getting around on my own might be simple, but I quickly found out this would not be an easy task. Their public transportation, the matatus, which are a bunch of different sized buses that reminded me of being on the Indiana Jones Ride in Disneyland, have no sort of advertised specific route. No helpful little drawing of the stops, and they're all privately operated, which doesn't help make you feel much safer. I honestly could not have ridden these without the help of my host sister who was a master of public transportation. I felt extremely safe in her company and she told me where to get on and when to get off and without question I did as instructed.
I eventually resulted to Ubering, mainly because public transportation couldn't take me to the school, but it wasn't much easier. I quickly discovered you need data to get an Uber and thank goodness for my mother who was able to assist me with that. What surprised me was that I had to actually know where I was going in the Uber. I have become so accustomed to sitting quietly in the passenger seat (or the back seat, if I was feeling especially anti-social) in the U.S. that when the Kenya drivers expected me to direct them through a country I still knew very little about I did not know how to handle it. I admit there was one sad day where I very poorly directed my driver and we drove in a circle and he was not happy. When we finally arrived at the stop, he attempted to overcharge me (In Kenya, Ubers only operate by cash so sometimes drivers try and change the price to get more), but like my host sister taught me I kept my stance and paid what was deserved. I did feel bad though, and learned my lesson and knew how to get to the school from then on.
My host family was my rock, the love Dr. K and Ruth gave me was endless. They were my tour guides, my shelter, but most importantly my family. They kindly listened to me about my day at the school, each and every day, and I enthusiastically asked about theirs as well. We got to go to a Wedding together, my very first wedding ever, and they didn't laugh at me as I cried at any emotional movie or mostly at the beauty of the wedding. I even got to have a sleepover with the cousins, who kindly welcomed me as their own. I got to live out the dream of having a big family cousin sleepover, something I always wished I could be a part of growing up. I learned their cute family nicknames for each other and by the end of the trip I could call Ruth-- Mwendwa because I was considered a part of the family. I truly could not have learned about the culture of the country without their support, or have had the chance to eat so many traditional meals.
While I adored my host fam, by far, my favorite part of the trip was having the opportunity to volunteer at an all girls boarding school. I dedicated my time to the students and served as both a mentor and friend. These girls filled my heart with so much joy. Their questions were profound and they thought so globally, contemplating questions about discrimination and the LGBTQ+ community. We even got to talk about women's issues in the country, which made my heart flutter. I loved seeing young girls care about these issues, especially because in my gut I was always worried they had simply accepted this role in their society.
These girls are truly some of the hardest working students I have ever met. I may have had a bunch of smart friends throughout the course of my life, but I truly believe these girls intelligence surpasses anyone I knew previously. Even after some time of being there, I am still trying to wrap my head around the educational system. There is so much pressure on these students to perform well and their academics are rigorous. With 10 core subjects, and waking up at 4:30AM and going to class till sometimes as late as 9PM it is certainly nothing like the experience I had in high school. I commended these girls on all their hard work as often as possible.
I remember one girl raising her hand to ask a question something along the lines of "how important is school?" As an individual who believes in the power of education, I made that belief known. I explained the power in being educated and how important schooling is, but then I realized the root of her question. It wasn't about school as a whole. It was about testing. I felt the atmosphere switch as I answered the question as she meant it. I addressed the undeniable fact, that yes it's important to do well on tests, and that it can be beneficial to your future, but I tried to focus on the more important part (in my opinion)-- that those tests or grades will never define who they are. It's hard concept for these students to understand when every single student's grades are posted for everyone to see with the name attached to the grade. A lot for these students IS defined by grades.
It was in that moment that I saw my purpose at this school. I couldn't teach a subject while there, I was evidently not qualified for something like that, especially with the specific academic standards at the school. But what I could do was teach these girls they mattered. I stopped into classrooms and answered whatever questions they had about the world or life. I answered questions about myself and even played their monkey sometimes, by dancing for them, singing them the National Anthem of the United States, and lots of endless playing with my hair, but I tried to make it a point that they mattered, that they were doing amazing things, that they were beautiful.
I got to especially achieve this goal with my 2G class. I had decided to lead a workshop on self-esteem. The first day, I determined that we would talk about what self-esteem means and have an open conversation. It was meant to set up the groundwork for what we would do the following week. I almost immediately realized how shy they were to talk about this. I don't blame them, I was generally a stranger, and it's not always the easiest thing to talk about. I kept asking for their feelings. It was rather funny and sometimes they would laugh at me, but I did not get discouraged. I knew how important this was and I was going to authentically be myself. After having to slightly force them to talk, I was somewhat nervous about the end activity I planned for the day. I told them to finish we would each be making 3 commitments to ourselves this week on the basis of self-esteem. I read them mine to set an example and to open up as well. It was as followed:
I will believe in myself
I will better myself
I will pay attention to the things I like about myself
It was not anything elaborate, but it was 3 commitments I could keep up for myself. I then asked the girls to take the time to write their own. At this point, I realized we actually had more time left than I expected. I had previously only planned to have them share in pairs, but since we had the time and I wanted the chance to hear from each one of them... after they were done writing I announced that we would be sharing to everyone. Standing up proudly and declaring our commitments. A timidness flew through the room, as I asked "who would like to start?" and then someone bravely in the back of the classroom stood up confidently to begin. I loved this. We all clapped after each person went and I made weird enthusiastic supportive noises, like a good "woo!" I love a good "woo!" The girls actually really got into it and I even taught them a conference clap, so we were effective with time. For those who do not know, a conference clap is when after a person is done everyone claps once in unison immediately afterward. Some got lazy with the clap, but when I reminded them it would sound cooler when we all do it together, the girls got back into it.
When this activity concluded, I once again asked "okay, how did that make everyone feel?" Quicker than expected someone raised her hand and my eyes directed toward her. I motioned her to speak. "That was awesome" she said. Those are the words that came out of her mouth. That was awesome. It created a ripple of participation and other girls contributed to share positive things. I hardly remember anything else that was said because my head was still stuck on the "it was awesome." An activity I planned all by myself and lead and discussed with these girls, was AWESOME. I felt more than awesome in that moment, I was speechless. Afterward, I reminded them of how important talking about these things are. I also took a moment to have everyone turn to someone around them to tell them that they believe in them and that they are holding them accountable. I told them I would see them next week and there was plenty more in store.
In preparation for the 2nd day with them, I wrote a poem. I really enjoy spoken word, so I wrote it on the board and told them that they would confidently state it in unison. We practiced, and I kept telling the girls I couldn't hear them, encouraging them to say it louder and prouder. It made me so happy and I am so happy I had filmed it, so I can treasure that moment forever. That was only the beginning. Next I handed out some sticky notes and directed them each to take three. I told them to write motivational and uplifting things on each sticky note and then we would display them on the mirrors in the bathroom, so even the other girls who didn't get to be a part of this conversation could be impacted as well. I told them we would hang them up after the last activity.
Then I started to talk to the girls about how people externally can impact our self esteem. In honor of that idea, we did a compliment web for the last activity. The girls had never heard of this before, which made me even more excited to do it. The idea is that you get some yarn/string and you throw it to someone and compliment them while holding on to a piece of string. This continues until everyone in the circle is complimented and it forms a web with everyone holding a piece. The girls enjoyed this activity as well and some even got emotional. The main reason I wanted to do this activity is that in conclusion I went around and had cut some of the string so that each girl could have a little bracelet on her wrist. This was the day before I would be leaving and I wanted to girls to have a little symbolic memory from our conversation, so that they could always look down to their wrist and remember they matter. The girls then ran and posted the sticky notes in the bathrooms, much higher than I expected, I was impressed. A girl from the class turned to me and said "you've been here less than a month and you've already left a legacy," I promise you on the inside I was screaming and crying tears of joy. Lastly, we met in the courtyard area for a lil photoshoot.
I didn't have a specific job when coming to St. George's Secondary School for Girls, but after this workshop concluded I felt accomplished and beyond proud of the work I did. If I could make one class, or even just one girl believe in herself more over the course of my time at the school, I knew I made an impact.
In truth, I don't think I have ever felt more loved than on my very last day at the school. I got the chance to speak at assembly, which I did not initially think would happen, ya know with the strict framework of the school, but when I asked the principal if I could I was delighted with the fact that she had no problem with that, and she just reminded me that I had to introduce myself in Swahili because Friday assemblies don't typically have English, but she would be willing to make the exception for me.
So come Friday, I had prepared to say "hello" and "my name is" in Swahili. The girls all giggled, but I later confirmed with some of the girls that I actually sounded good, but they didn't expect it. I proceeded with a poem I wrote in honor of my leaving. It rhymed, of course, in the most authentic Katie way. I wanted my poem to motivate, inspire, and leave them knowing how much I cared. I think I actually did that. The person who I shadowed told me it had made her cry. I compared the girls to stars, similar to the poem I had written to my 2G girls, "you are all stars, even in the darkness you will glow, I can't wait to see, all the places you'll go." At the end of my speech, I got a little goofy and off-script. I told the girls, "I don't know if this is weird, but I am a hugger, so if anyone would like a hug before I leave I will be around," when I initially said this I expected to get a few hugs, maybe get hugs from the girls I previously connected to, I don't know, but basically I did not expect what had happened.
There I was feeling like a character at Disneyland, as the girls lined up to hug me. Ones I had never met, ones who had followed me around all week, ones who were originally afraid of me, they lined up to hug me. I was touched and full of love. Some girls even got back into line after hugging me. Some started to cry and I held back my tears. My moments with these girls were more than special. I dreaded my trip coming to an end because I could see spending the rest of the summer with these girls, heck maybe even the rest of my life. I felt fulfilled and so happy for this chance.
I think we don't talk about the well-being of our students enough, or our friends, or ourselves, or people in general. It's a problem. We get so caught up in the world, thinking we need to do this, pass this, achieve this, without even taking a moment to think about these things and how they are actually impacting us. We get so caught up in the world that we forget that we matter. I think that's a message we can never forget. I got spend a month in Kenya teaching it to high school girls who need it, in my opinion, more than anyone. But just because we don't see it from the outside, doesn't mean a person doesn't need that reminder. I challenge all who are reading this to remind at least one person in your life that they matter and why they are so important. Kindness and reassurance in this world can go a long way. I strive to forever bring sunshine to whatever situations I can in life, and I hope you can too. Remember that each one of you are loved and matter more than you will ever know.
There is still so much about the world I don't know, but I am nowhere near done learning. I think books can be a nice way to learn some things, but if you ever get the chance to take off and go to an unknown place. GO. These moments are indescribable and like no other. I feel so privileged to have spent time in Kenya. I am so happy to leave that school as the "nice girl," "being wise," and "someone who left a legacy" I kid you not these girls were much too sweet to me. The whole school was. My host family. The whole country. I will not forget. I will not take it for granted. Thank you. Thank you for all these memories.
Here's my poem to honor my experience:
Kenya, Africa
From the forest to the coast
It's a land of many tribes
Still a mystery to most
Full of matatus
Ensuring for an interesting time
With some of the freshest fruit in the world
Their oranges look like a lime
Now what Kenya is known for
The ever wonderful tea
Add a little sugar and honey
But know the milk is key
It is had often, more than 2X a day
The Kenyans like it not warm, but hot
Seldom with their food?
Why absolutely not.
In the world
Or at least the U.S.A
We have these thoughts Africans are suffering
Barely making it day by day
But in reality it's different
Well at least in Nairobi, Kenya where we are,
I know this might sound crazy
Yup, they even drive cars.
There is beauty that is hidden
Not talked about or seen
There are those that are poor, those that are rich
But there are also many living decently comfortable in between
It's more than just the animals
The poverty and disparities too
It's also a country full of loving people
Who would do anything for you!
Don't discount the robbery
And the danger can be real
There is plenty of corruption
Even with the police you can strike a deal
But at the root of people
Lays kindness, support and food
Prepare your stomach for Kenya
Because denying food here is rude
I mean it when I say they'll love you
Protecting you like their own
They keep their children close
Whether be that they're babies or that they're grown
There's lots of greeting
Saying hi to all the people you meet
Lots of hugging and handshakes
But this is not what you do on the street
I'm learning to no longer smile at others
As we walk along a busy path
Or you might look vulnerable
And endure another person's wrath
There's so much about Kenya
The media never seems to tell
In fact all those clothes you donate?
They turn around and sell
In markets, on the streets,
Wherever seems to work
Card is almost pointless in their country
Having Kenyan Shillings is always a perk
Now there's many Kenyans who walk
Day or night, they are there
When it comes to the roads
The matatus don't really know how to share
To me: the roads are chaos
A big driving fear
Car coming from everywhere
The sides, the front and the rear
It takes a sense of courage
I can't imagine being behind the wheel
Also they drive on the right and the left of the road
It's quite different, ya feel?
While having been here (at the time) for 2 weeks,
There is so much more I don't know
Each day there's a new question
Like how does the coffee really grow?
Yet I could not be more thankful this
The experience, my host family, the curiosity still exists
The cultural differences can sometimes be a challenge
But nevertheless, I persist
While going to a safari experience was cool
And seeing random animals is fun
My work at the school
Is nothing near done
Talking to the girls is effortless
And fills my heart with joy
I want these girls to believe in themselves
That there is nothing more special that being a boy
There are gender differences
Ones that weighs in on their lives
But it's important for their future
They see themselves as more than wives
I already see so much power in them
Intelligence, kindness and leaders too
I hope I will get the chance before I leave
To say: I am inspired by all of you
I may be in an unfamiliar place
With people I only just came to know
I am eternally grateful
For this place helping me to grow.
special shoutout to the San Diego State University College of Education and Dr. William Twayigize for making this adventure possible!
Commentaires