This isn't a phrase that I would say applies to most parts of my life, in fact, I am normally very intentional with the things I apply to and am quick to jump to conclusions if I do not meet the criteria. I know it's the typical woman thing. We hear about it all the time. Women consistently will not apply to things that they they aren't qualified for, but men will and often get the job. We know the story and yet it seems to persist, even for me, an ambitious feminist.
So during last semester, when my fementor (female-mentor) recommended the NAPSA Hills Day event to me, I struggled with not feeling competent enough. Before reading the requirements, she had explained to me what the event was about. She knew about my love for education and policy work, and let me just say as she described it, I got overwhelmed with excitement sitting in her office. "This is perfect," I thought. The opportunity to better learn about higher education issues, the chance to lobby to legislators about something I really care about, AND all the while a wonderful excuse to take a trip to my favorite mall, the national one...in WASHINGTON D.C.. It truly was perfect. All I had to do was get accepted.
As I left my fementor's office and proceeded home, I opened my email to check the link she forwarded to me and explored the event page to read more. Learning about the Higher Education Act, awesome I should know more about it. Review DACA/Undocumented Students support, it's impacting so many students, I have to learn more. Title IX, yet another issue I can't wait to spend time getting to know better. And that's when I saw it: "including Vice Presidents of Student Affairs and senior level professionals and new professionals" that's when the fear occurred. There was no mention of being a student. Maybe this program isn't meant for me, but my fementor showed it to me. Could I consider myself a new professional? I've done plenty of Student Affairs jobs on campus from being a Resident Advisor, Interning for the Dean of Students, and working in the Women's Resource Center--- I've been pretty involved on campus to say the least, but could I really claim myself as a new professional? I didn't know.
As the deadline to submit the application grew closer, I pondered whether I should even try. Then it suddenly it occurred to me, if my fementor believed in my ability enough to recommend the program to me, then I should believe in myself to at least submit an application. I applied. I also sent an email to the staff helping to further explain myself and why someone like me should be a part of this event. I was no longer just believing in myself, I was also standing up for myself and my abilities. I never ended up receiving a response and figured maybe it just wouldn't work out.
Suddenly in July, I got an email, and to my surprise I got ACCEPTED to the program. I couldn't believe it. I emailed my fementor right away, in shock that this had become a reality. I was going to be going to D.C. in December for one of the best reasons in the world--- to lobby for issues related to Higher Education.
Now that the program is over, I could not be more thankful that I had decided to apply for NASPA Hills Day. I was very hesitant at first, very. I noticed how mature everyone looked at our first gathering, and I knew with age comes knowledge. I began to once again doubt my abilities and sit there thinking "I'm only a student, what could I teach them?" And yet, even though I was different my opinion was still important. It reminded me of sitting on the Santa Clara Unified School District - Strategic Planning Committee, where I sat hesitate as the only student in the room. It was there I had originally realized the significant of the student voice, and my group helped me to realize that in D.C.
I got to meet a variety of people who also care so deeply for education. I got placed on a team of supportive men who often commented on how successful I would be, after only knowing them for a few hours. They asked about my future as I rambled on addressing my inner confusion with all the possibilities and yet again they affirmed me that I would be doing great things, and in fact, "don't forget about me when you're someone important!" They were too kind, and it made me feel like I belonged in the room with them. The most important fact was that they reaffirmed the fact that I was a student, expressing "we're lucky, no one has the secret weapon we do" in reference to me. I was touched and happy, and I BELONGED THERE.
I not only got the chance to explore D.C. and take in MONUMENTal moments, ride around on a scooter attempting to see every site, worship Ruth Bader Ginsburg outside the Supreme Court and walk down the beautiful cobblestones of Georgetown, plus CUPCAKES.
But I got to do something important for the world, for the world of education and speak up for important Higher Education issues that are currently impacting schools and students across the country. I got to represent my school with pride and got a reminder that my opinion is valuable.
My point in this message is that --- the thing you are deeply interested in, but you don't think you're good enough for, give it a try. There is no harm in trying and I truly believe that we are more capable than we ever give ourselves credit for. Go after your dreams and never let your doubt stand in your way. I couldn't have imagined if I gave up this opportunity. I am so glad a little bravery and an incredible fementor could push me to go after my aspirations.
So apply for that job, go after that fellowship, get admitted to that college, attend that amazing conference, believe in yourself and take action!
Comments